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teenage social media - Just a couple months ago my son Nathan, age 13, declared he wanted a FaceBook account. All of his close friends had one, and the man wanted one, too.

After my stomach knotted a bit and that i said a silent prayer, I agreed that he could open a FaceBook account, but told him there'd make sure "conditions."

Like all child today, Nathan often involves father and mother with requests because of this thing or that thing he absolutely can't live without. And the man always comes prepared with convincing arguments...why he craves a cellphone, the newest gaming innovation, or any other 15 songs from iTunes.

His cases are strong, but my spouse and i are united within our position that Nathan shouldn't get exactly what he requests. If he did, what can there be to look forward to, to operate towards, to desire? That is why Nathan does not have an XBox, PlayStation or Wii. He doesn't own a PSP rather than has received a GameBoy.

Everything being said, Nathan has always had a computer. Starting at three years old having a kid's VTech computer bought in ToysRUs, he's upgraded every several years towards the latest, greatest, yet reasonable version...but the creme de la creme was his iMac which he got for Christmas a year ago. He really doesn't lose out on a great deal. He still grows to play games (only it's those created for a computer), but also along with his computer he creates music using his guitar, records and enhances songs with GarageBand, adds original soundtracks to their own iMovies, and uses it to complete his homework. Though never to excess, we encourage his computer interest.

So when Nathan stumbled on me together with his FaceBook request, I said "yes," albeit by incorporating trepidation. Like most parents, I have heard the horror stories and knew the possibility danger the Internet and sites like Facebook might cause to get a vulnerable teenager. But I'm also an advocate of informing and educating our children so as they mature they could increase the risk for right choices for themselves. It's just that in-between time from child to young adult that is so perilous these days to cause us parents to look gray, particularly with the added chance of the Internet.

So this is exactly why the "conditions." I told Nathan it absolutely was similar to driving a car. It would be foolish of me or his father handy over the keys at 16 or 17 and expect him to use an automobile safely without correct training, instruction and guidance. The same holds true using the Internet and, in this instance, using a FaceBook account. There's things he needs to know to maintain himself safe, to protect his privacy which of his friends', and to view the "ins and outs" of safe maneuvering through a teen's social networking.

tommy jordan - Just what exactly were these "conditions?"

1. The email that Nathan registered his FaceBook account with was one which I'd access to. That meant whenever you want I really could enter into his account, take a peek and make sure everything on his FaceBook met the "Mom and pa Everything Looks Okay" test. Also, anything that was written on his wall stumbled on me via email notification.

2. He agreed to "Random FaceBook Reviews" where we'd question to consider us through his account. We were holding meant to be instructional, basically fun, low-key reviews of what he shared in his profile, pictures (if any) he displayed, what was compiled by his friends on his Wall, bumper stickers he collected along with other things he may supply for view by his friends.

3. He could only "Friend" kids he knew, and zero adults (apart from his dad, me, and the Aunt Carol).

4. The computer he used could be located in a public spot within our house rather than as part of his room or behind a closed door.

We constantly adjust as things change like FaceBook updates and extra features, but the operative word the following is "we." It is a "family affair." Nathan sees that father and mother are involved because we're most worried about his safety rather than about attempting to catch him doing something wrong. Now, it is not always touring; perform have conflicts, nevertheless the important things is always that we keep the communication lines open.

And you know, I've come across some positive results with all the FaceBook experience, also. Teenage tend to be tough territory to go...especially the early teens. You've some teens maturing quickly, while some not so much. And it's really hard...on the boys and girls. But what I'm obtaining from the messages and other FaceBook dialog from Nathan's "friends," both children, is surely an ease that they communicate through this medium...bypassing that awkwardness that people encountered as teens. Specialists Nathan about that, if FaceBook managed to get easier to speak with girls or to other folks he may not usually meet in the band of friends. He agreed it had been a pressure-free, fun way to talk to someone who he might not ordinarily feel safe talking to.

FaceBook offers a chance for all to customize their space, encouraging our youngsters to become creative and giving "friends" an overview into the thing that makes our youngsters stand out. Finally, it has a backdrop where to have instructional conversations with our kids. For example, two to three weeks ago I was seeing some emails arriving that have been not favorable towards a specific young female. I made use of it as a learning opportunity, emphasizing empathy and reminding Nathan how however not want others to discuss him the way his friends were discussing this young girl...an actual learning opportunity that without FaceBook we probably would have missed.

teenage social media - As I'm writing this, Nathan makes my office and asks, "Hey, mom, there exists a funny bumper sticker about... (some marginally inappropriate saying). Any idea what? Can one put it on my FaceBook? I do believe it's hilarious!!

"Alright," I agree when i remind myself that is really a predictable developmental milestone. I am not too old to remember things i was like at this age. Pick your battles, Susan, just pick your battles.